Wednesday, May 4, 2011
CAREERS is STAY-AT-HOME MOM ONE ANYMORE?
I’ve been doing a lot of Career Day sessions at Middle Schools and High Schools lately, and have noticed a change from when I was a kid. No one professes that when they grow up, they want to get married and be a mom. I mean when I went to school, half of the girls there would proclaim that when they grew up they wanted to get married, have kids and be an at-home wife.
Is that a dying career goal for our girls? Is it no longer considered a future prospect or acceptable prospect for a teen girl to depend on her husband to manage the house.
HOW HAVE TEEN GIRLS VIEWS OF FAMILY HAVE CHANGED
With so many divorces, mixed families, or single parent household, many girls don’t believe that they can totally trust that a man or another person will be that devoted to take care of them and the kids financially for their entire lives. They are willing to talk about staying home with their kids – but with the thought to be prepared just in case things don’t work out. Wow!
I can honestly say I get that. My mom didn’t marry my father, and when she did get married the guy was abusive. Also, for as long as I can remember the women in my family weren’t home makers. They worked and coordinated childcare between each other. But secretly, I wanted a ‘normal’ family with mom at home like I’d seen on TV and dad a perfect support and provider (I grew up watching Leave it to Beaver, The Brady Bunch, etc)
HOW HAVE TEEN BOYS VIEWS OF FAMILY CHANGED
I also believe our teen boys are more flexible than in the past. The thought of men staying home as the care-giving parent isn’t such a far-fetched idea anymore. Also, as for my son, he wants his wife to work also. Which shocked me, and I asked him why. He stated well you’re a great mom and you work to, why can’t you babysit my kids and my wife and I work. Huh?! Well that’s not such a crazy idea considering that’s what my mom has done for me. She stayed home with my kids, cooked and cleaned while my husband and I worked. She did it only for a few years, but it helped a lot. Also, with the death of a family friend, who’s wife had been home raising their kids – my son witnessed the financial devastation of the family since the mother had no job skills. As well as my husband stayed home with my younger two kids for 5 years while owning a Real Estate business to supplement lost income. So my son experienced all types of family support structures for the kids.
HOW DOES YA BOOKS PORTRAY THIS
I believe the future is boundless. The make up of family will continue to change with husband and wives freely being able to switch roles as needed. It’s starting to happen in some YA books. More YA lit is showing alternate family structures. Usually though most have a mom and dad – but let’s face it, they’ve probably been killed off. Some I wonder may even have alternative households with single mom, blended families or even a mom or dad that have various sexual orientations. Who knows? So watch out for the shifts.
DO YOU KNOW OF ANY YA with an ALTERNATIVE or DIFFERENT FAMILY STRUCTURE?