Friday, December 3, 2010
DO YOU HAVE SWAGGER?
DO YOU HAVE SWAGGER?
Swagger = charisma, coolness, that something that draws people to you and makes them want to hang around.
You know those people, writers write them, readers love them or hate them, but we all… sorta want to have a bit of that SWAGGER. That’s what my teen son and his high school group use for the word I used to call COOL. The word may have changed, but being popular in your own way will never go away.
DO YOU HAVE TO BE BORN WITH IT?
Nope! It’s something you can get by: growing into it, working at it, or just being in the right place to have it. Every group has one. The ‘go to’ girl or guy.
Growing Into It:
My son (shhh… don’t tell him I’m talking about him) didn’t always have it. Neither did I. His story is, up until 7th grade he was pretty much bullied. Him and his friends were the kids that always seemed to get caught holding the basket if you know what I mean. I’m telling you whenever there was someone getting in trouble – my boy was usually just hanging around ‘watching’ and would be hauled off with them. He was kinda the one most kids liked to pick on. BUT WAIT something changed in 7th grade. He started to get involved in school activities, he started playing football (for the first time he actually wanted to play), basketball, track and you know what…he started to get it. That SWAGGER just by widening his ‘friend and acquaintance’ base. People knew him and you know what else he did? He found a friend that had that ‘natural’ SWAGGER and hung out with him. I guess it must of rubbed off, because now…he has his own swagger.
Working At IT:
Well, me on the other hand, I worked at it. When I was in middle school, I watched girls that had it and truth was…I wanted that SWAGGER and I wanted it bad. Now I wasn’t jealous, I just wanted my on entourage of friends and peeps that thought I was cool. You know that I fit in with and who listened to me when I had you know a ‘deep’ thought or idea. So what did I do, I befriended the popular group by use of …(I’m ashamed to say it now) bribery. See I had a side business at school. I sold candy – lots of it, but if you were in the cool group, I used it as a way to sit at their table. Soon, kids that wanted to be in the group with SWAGGER sought me out. They knew that they would never be excepted in the uber SWAGGER group, but were more than willing to bask in the glow of someone that was able to step into that group and report all the juicy gossip gained by hanging out with a group with SWAGGER.
Right Place Right Time:
Sometimes you can get SWAGGER by the luck of the draw. You can be at the ‘right’ place at the ‘right’ time. For instance, (another example of my son – Shhhhh… don’t tell him I told you) we went on a cruise ship sometime ago. The ship had a lame teen party. Well my son had been working really hard on his break dancing at the time to get ready for a school dance. On the cruise though, he was the only kid that knew how to break dance, and when the party kicked off … that’s what he did. Then the kid taught others how to do it and Viola’ he got SWAGGER by being in the right place at the right time.
SO HOW DO YOU GET YOUR SWAGGER?
Believe you have it? Get comfortable talking with people. Don’t sweat rejection, just move on to the next possible friend in order to find your own friends that you can SWAGGER with. Share the SWAGGER if you have it, by treating people the way you would want to be treated. And get your SWAGGER on!